ECW Hardcore Revolution |
Nintendo 64 |
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Review by Matt Paprocki |
Wrestling |
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Graphics: 6 |
Sound: 4 |
Gameplay: 2 |
Overall: 2.5 |
Recently,
after pulling off some stealthy maneuvers Metal gear Solid style, I was
able to spy in on an Acclaim staff meeting. This just happened to be at
the time that they were discussing their latest project which I happen to
be reviewing here, ECW: Hardcore Revolution. Developer #1: Hey
Joe, we just lost our WWF license to EA's cash machine! What the hell are
we going to do now? We can't just rake in the cash by overproducing bad
WWF games!!! Some Guy named Joe: Why don't we make a game
based on ECW? Ya know, that new federation that's getting some
exposure..... D #1: Man, that would take some work to pull off
and cost alot of money. Joe: Oh, not at all. We'll use the
same WWF engine that we've used for 4 years, swap out some textures, add
some cheesy barb wire match, tons of blood, and kids we'll eat it
up! Some guy in the back: Make the crowd cuss too!
D #1: Great idea! That "M" rating will really cause some
controversy! Oh, and we'll release it across multiple platforms for
maximum profits!
At this point, I got caught some really fat security guy and got booted out. (Disclaimer: The story above is fiction. The people are not real, nor is the story true, though it probably is...) Anyway, ECW may be the greatest thing to happen to professional wrestling in years, but it's a sad day when Acclaim chooses to use their age-old WWF attitude engine in a so called "new" game. Yaeh, there are a few new characters, but the majority of these guys could've been created with Attitudes create-a-wrestler feature. Remember how to do a bodyslam in Attitude. That's how you do it here. Yep, all of those button mashing moves you've memorized only to hate them work the same way here. Also, the unresponsive controls, graphical glitches, really bad motion capture, and poor sound quality made their way into this cart. Oh, for anyone who cares, there is a new goatee in the create-a-wrestler mode. That makes the game worth $60, huh? No matter how much you enjoy ECW, pro wrestling, or video games, this game sucks. It sucked 2 years ago when it was called "Warzone," 1 year ago when it was called "Attitude," and it still sucks now. If your even thinking about renting this game, stop. Think of pretty butterflies or something. Go to a happy place.....your happy place.... |